


Now That You Know the Truth

by TheBigLoserQueen



Series: Western AU [1]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Acceptance, Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Western, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Femslash, Fluff, Happy Ending, Human, Kissing, Light Angst, Making Out, Western, gender stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-07
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-07-29 21:26:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7700275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBigLoserQueen/pseuds/TheBigLoserQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Strika never had a problem pretending to be a man. Until she met Red Alert.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Now That You Know the Truth

Strika never once hated her life. Though she would have known other women to potentially hare this, she never had any qualms with how her parents raised her. Her parents had wanted a boy. They _needed_ a boy, to take over the family ranch, they said. So when she had been born, a girl, they had panicked.

And in that panic, they decided to pass her off as one.

Paying the doctor and midwife off had been easy enough. And all they had to do was say she was a boy and raise her as such. Perhaps it was for the best though… She had grown into a giant, way too masculine looking to even be considered a girl. She was 6’10, muscular, and hardly had any breasts… Only men’s clothes fitted her correctly.

And she had never really been interested in wearing dresses or acting “ladylike,” especially when it seemed to be so restricting. There was a lot of freedom living as a man, despite the pressure on her to keep her true gender a secret. Her friends would be a little suspicious as to why she never joined them when they went to visit brothels, but now they just made fun of her for the most part, thinking that she was a “goody-good” and the like. One of her friends even joked about paying for one of the girls to take her first time, but she was able to get him to back off for now.

She was fortunate enough that she didn’t need to fake being attracted to women. Ever since she could remember, Strika had always been attracted to women. She had started to notice it around the time she was teenager, finding herself very drawn to breasts. Men never did anything for her, which she supposed did help her out during her time pretending to be a man. At least whenever they talked about women, she didn’t have to fake her attraction.

While she wasn’t as crude as her friends, she still caught herself staring at and admiring the single women in her town. But because she wasn’t like her friends, the women of the town had deemed her to be a “gentleman.” And some of the bolder women, mainly the one from the brothel, would flirt with her because of that. It would leave her slightly embarrassed at first, but she was used to it now. Dealing with women had gotten easier when she got older.

And then there was the town doctor’s only daughter, Red Alert. Unlike her parents, Red Alert’s father had no issues with her learning to become a doctor like him and was in no rush to marry her off and have her live in another man’s house. And she was learning well too, acting as his nurse and helping him out whenever he had patients.

She was young, intelligent, and independent. And, as much as Strika didn’t want to admit it, she was very attractive too. Pretty face, elegant figure, soft and deep red hair, and… a very full bust. Not to mention she was kind and was a good person to have conversation with. And since cattle ranching came with a lot of injuries, mostly small, she was in the doctor’s place plenty of times. Which meant she and Red Alert had talked a lot.

Strika wouldn’t lie. She had a huge crush on the doctor’s daughter, even though it was pointless. Even if she was pretending to be a man, she could never actually marry the young woman. They couldn’t start a family, she could never give Red Alert a life a man could give her. As much as it pained her to admit it, Red Alert would have been better off marrying that childhood friend of hers, Inferno. He wasn’t a bad guy either, a little hot headed, but he was a good guy. He would have made a good husband for her.

Unfortunately, Red Alert didn’t have those sort of feelings for her friend. She had them for a certain cattle rancher she talked to a lot… And Strika couldn’t seem to make her change said feelings.

She wanted to be happy. The woman she like had the same feelings. But Red Alert was in love with Strika because she thought she was a man. If she knew she was a woman, Strika doubted Red Alert would consider her anything but a friend. And she didn’t want Red to accuse her of being a pervert or a liar… Someone who tricked her and manipulated her feelings or something like that. The last thing she wanted was for Red Alert to hate her.

So she had to act like she didn’t know. And that she wasn’t interested in returning those feelings. But Primus, was it hard. Especially when Red Alert was becoming more… aggressive as time went on.

Like tonight. The woman had somehow convinced her to join her for a night of “simply drinking” at the saloon. And it had started off that way… Just drinking and good conversation. With Red Alert occasionally dropping a cute flirt here and there that made Strika blush or tense up from time to time. She so badly wanted to reciprocate but just couldn’t. Not when it would risk everything.

She thought she could at least enjoy her company. Be the envy of her friends, since many of them had crushes on the beautiful redhead. It was a nice… though with every flirt, she found herself drinking more and more to hide her embarrassment and appear apathetic about each one. And she didn’t even realize she was drinking herself into a stupor.

She only came back to her senses when they had left the tavern. She had walked the beautiful young woman home… and then just as she was about to say goodbye, Red Alert suddenly grabbed her and pulled her inside. Pushed her up against the doorframe and kissed her. Hard.

Strika, even in her drunk mindset, wanted to push her away. Wanted to tell her to stop. That she couldn’t give or even be what Red Alert wanted. That everything about her was a lie. That once Red Alert knew the truth, she would want nothing to do with her.

But instead, Strika’s arms came up and wrapped tightly around the beautiful woman. Red Alert squeaked, but didn’t resist. Her arms wrapped around her neck while Strika’s hands roamed up and down her dress. It was just a kiss… an intense kiss. She could at least have that with the woman who stole her heart, right? Especially when it felt even better than she ever could have possibly imagined…

She was so soft. And her lips were so sweet. Her breasts pressed up against her chest, every part of Strika’s body felt alert and alive. And Red Alert, though clearly a bit of a novice with the kiss, was passionately kissing back as best as she could. Strika’s heart raced in her chest, wishing and wanting for more… but she knew she couldn’t. That this was as far as they could go.

 But she didn’t feel Red Alert’s hands drop to her belt. Nor did she notice her unbuckling it either. She finally froze up when she felt her push them down, her hand coming up to her underwear. To rub against a part that didn’t exist.

“Stop!”

She ended up pushing the smaller woman away with a little too much force. The doctor’s daughter stumbled back, almost falling to the floor if she hadn’t used the wall to catch herself. She looked shocked, staring at the other in confusion. Strika couldn’t even find it in her to apologize for shoving her; she just stared back, pale and uncertain.

It had been a pretty blundering move on her part, but what else was she supposed to do? Red Alert had… felt nothing. Strika was aroused, but she was not a man. She didn’t have an erection. And Red now knew that.

And by the look on her face, she was very aware that doesn’t wasn’t right.

“R-Red, I… I…”

The younger woman glanced at her hand before her eyes fell back to Strika’s unbuckled pants. Oh Primus… Primus, she was putting it all together. She knew. She was a doctor’s daughter – of course she could figure out what was probably going on!

“… Strika… You’re…”

Strika paled, pressing back into the wall, trying to disappear into the wood. Everything. Everything was ruined. Their relationship was over. Because she wasn’t the man Red Alert wanted. And now, she would hate her. She would think her a pervert. And her secret could potentially get out to the entire town. Strika didn’t want the entire town looking at her like she was some sort of deviant.

Primus, why couldn’t she just have been born a man? Then she wouldn’t have had to pretend. She wouldn’t have had to worry about Red Alert finding out. About Red Alert hating her. She could have reciprocated her feelings, they could have been together, gotten married, maybe have a family… Everything would have been a dream.

Instead, everything was a ridiculous nightmare.

“Pl-Please, just-!”

Red Alert looked at her, eyes wrapped with confusion. And slight fear. Maybe disgust too, but Strika couldn’t be sure. And she didn’t want to know either, but she had to explain. To give her side of the story. So, even if she did hate her, she wouldn’t think she was some sort of sexual deviant or had done this to trick her.

Still… There was a lot she knew she needed to say. Even if she had hoped to never tell anyone. Just where was she supposed to start?

“… Does my father know?” Red Alert asked.

Strika couldn’t look at her, only able to give her a single nod.

Red Alert bit her bottom lip and looked away. That made sense… Whenever Strika came into the office, her father would always send her away while he tended to Strika in the back. Because he knew that… Strika wasn’t a man. He… She was a woman. Like her.

And it would explain why her father never seemed to mind her hanging around Strika when he would be stricter about her being with other men, including Inferno. It would also explain why he would always gently dismiss her notions of wanting to be courted by Strika. She had thought it was because he knew the other wasn’t interested in her. But no… It was because she could never actually be with Strika in that way.

“Your father… He was there when my mother gave birth,” Strika slowly explained, raising her head. Red Alert was just staring blankly at her, her expression unreadable. It made her nervous, but Strika forced herself to continue. “My parents had wanted a boy… Someone who could be respected in town and take over the ranch. A-And they had already had trouble getting pregnant with me… They were lucky they even had me, to be honest.”

Red Alert nodded to show she was listening.

“And when I came out… They decided to raise me as a boy. They paid off the midwife and your father, so on my birth certificate, it reads that I’m a man… Even though I’m a woman.”

She could see her hands twitch at the confirmation, but pretended she didn’t.

“I was fine with it. I never… I never wanted to be treated like a girl. I… I look like this–” she gestured to her masculine appearance “– so it was never like women’s clothes would fit me. And… And I like being able to do as I wish as a man… I never found this to be a burden. Life was fine for me, pretending… pretending to be a man. Until…”

“Un-Until… what?”

“… You.”

Red Alert’s eyes widened, another look of confusion coming over her face. Strika knew she was forcing herself to show her hand, but… there was no point in lying to her anymore. She probably already hated her. Why bother trying to hide everything else when she didn’t have anything else to lose?

“Red, I…”

Seeing the hesitate look on her face made her pause. Strika swallowing, hanging her head. She knew her feelings would have been deemed immoral. Though Red Alert had always been more open-minded, she had never had to experience a woman lusting after her. A woman who had pretended to be a man all this time… She feared what she would say, but Strika knew she had to say it. At least once.

“I like you, Red.”

She couldn’t bear to look at the face the doctor’s daughter was making. She didn’t want to see the fear or disgust that was probably on her face… It would break her heart.

“I… I’ve always been attracted to women,” she admitted. “And you… You were always so kind and friendly… intelligent and capable and beautiful and I just… I know I shouldn’t have, but I did. I started to like you. Even though I knew we couldn’t be together.”

Strika dared to glance up at the other, only to see she was hugging herself and looking at the floor. While it was better than seeing her face, the body language still set Strika on edge. As if any moment, Red Alert would start screaming at her. Kicking her out of the house. Cursing her. Hating her…

“… I know you liked… the man you thought I was. I… I’m sorry, but… I’m not a man. I-I’m a woman. I can’t… I can’t give you what you want. I-I never meant to trick you or have you come to like me or anything like that, b-but I’m sorry. I… I’m so sorry.”  

Silence filled the room, both of them unable to look at each. While Strika just stood there, waiting in agony for Red Alert to just say _something_ , the younger woman was still taking everything in. Still trying to process what Strika had just said while wrestling with her own emotions on the entire matter.

Strika… wasn’t a man. And it hadn’t necessarily been her choice. It was something she was forced to live with at birth, but… She didn’t hate it. She didn’t mind living as a man. A man who didn’t actually exist. A man Red Alert had grown attracted to. Yes, Strika was still the same person, her gender wasn’t why she fell for her, but… She had never thought about being with a woman. At least not seriously, she had a few fantasies when she was younger, but she had always found herself attracted to men… Or rather, the more muscular ones. Which was why she had been found Strika to be so handsome…

But Strika wasn’t a man like she thought. She… had lied. Not just to her, but everyone in town. Though it was for a good reason and wasn’t even her fault. She still felt upset about the whole thing though. But she fell for Strika, a man, who was actually a woman, who loved her back… Primus, this was just so much…

“I-!”

Strika stiffened, looking up to see Red Alert was hugging herself with her back turned to her.

“I… I need to be alone. Please.”

Strika’s heart sank, but she had anticipated this. She honestly didn’t know what was worse. Red Alert screaming at her or this silent treatment. Neither sounded pleasant, but… at least with the screaming, she would know. She could confirm the other’s hatred.

But this? It just left her anxious. Did Red Alert hate her? Was she so disgusted that she couldn’t even look at her? What was going through her head? What expression was she wearing? Strika didn’t know and couldn’t ask either.

All she could do was fix up her pants before leaving her, as asked. And Primus only knew when or if they would ever be able to face each other again. 

* * *

It had been two weeks since that night. And no one seemed to know about her true gender, which made Strika a little relieved. She didn’t think that Red Alert would tell the entire town the truth, but she was worried that maybe something would slip. But her secret seemed safe for now.

Strika made sure she didn’t get injured once while working, just so she didn’t have to go to the doctor’s office. She couldn’t bring herself to face Red Alert yet. Especially not when she could catch glimpses of her in town every so often, the beautiful woman doing everything she could to not look in her direction. It hurt, but Strika understood.

If she was a man, none of this would have happened. If she had just flat out rejected Red Alert when she started to notice her feelings for her, things wouldn’t have come to this. They probably still could have been friends, all the time Red Alert remained ignorant to her true gender. It could have been fine…

And now it wasn’t. And it probably never would be.  

But Strika tried not to fret about it. Getting herself emotional about this wouldn’t fix anything. It would just make her depressed. So instead, that evening, she sat on her couch after a long day’s work, drinking a bottle of beer. Primus… She just wanted to go to bed. Forget everything. Maybe she would even take a day off tomorrow. Give her a chance to just relax and take a breather. Maybe even get her thoughts all sorted out.

And maybe… Maybe she could attempt to talk to Red Alert again. Just try one more time. Ask her if they could sit down and talk about everything in private. Ask her if she hated her. If she wanted to leave her alone. And whatever her answer would be, Strika would respect her wishes. It would definitely take a while for her to get over her feelings, but she was fine with that. As long as Red Alert was content.

Strika slowly got up from the couch to put away the bottle. She needed to get ready for bed… She had already taken a bath, so now she just needed to throw on more comfortable pajamas. And the beer helped, so she was hoping to just crash into bed right away tonight.

But just as she set the bottle down on the counter, there was knocking on the door. Strika paused, looking back at it. Who the hell could it be at this hour? It was a weekday and late in the evening… Suspicious, she quietly stepped towards the door. Bandits? Robbers? Or maybe her secret had really gotten out and now people were coming for her…

“Who’s there?” she asked, keeping her voice gruff and deep. Maybe she could scare them off with her voice; it had worked before.

She could hear someone breathing. Light and a bit scared… And it was only the one person. At least she knew there wasn’t a mob after her, causing her to relax a little. But she couldn’t let her guard down yet.

“Hello?”

“… I-It’s me.”

Strika’s eyes widened, her entire body stiffening up in anxiety. Red Alert? She was here? And at this time of night?!

Quickly, she threw open the door to see Red Alert standing there, hugging herself tightly. Strika scanned her up and down, fearing that something might have happened to her. But she couldn't see any signs of injury, no clothes torn or dirty... Aside from her body language, she looked to be all right. A wave of relief came through her, if only for a moment.

Then she remembered that the woman who probably wanted nothing to do with her was standing in front of her.

"Ah-!" Strika quickly composed herself, taking a step back from the other. "A-Are... It's late, Red. You shouldn't be out by yourself this late at night."

"I-I know, but..." She took a deep breath before lifting up her head, looking Strika in the eye for the first time in two weeks. “I need to talk to you.”

She swallowed. Well… She supposed that was a fair reason. But she couldn’t have waited until morning when it was safer for a woman to be out at night? Or at least have one of her male friends or a group of her female friends escort her here? It wasn’t the time to lecture her, no, but still…

Shaking her head of such thoughts, she stepped out of the way to allow Red Alert inside. The young woman muttered out a sheepish “Thank you” before making her way into the living room. Strika just watched her, waiting for her to sit down. But she didn’t, simply standing there and looking back at her. Waiting. Watching.

Feeling like a mouse caught in a cat’s paw, Strika cleared her throat as she closed the door. To think she thought tonight would be a laidback one… Now she had no time to think and had to say everything to her. Start where, the hell if she knew. But she forced herself to stay composed as she walked over to the shorter woman, her steps awkward and slow.

Red Alert waited patiently, her eyes looking the woman up and down. For a brief moment, Strika wondered if the woman was trying to find a weak spot on her. Perhaps something she was going to share with some hitman…

Primus, she was thinking way too deeply about this.

“What… What did you want to discuss?” she asked.

Red Alert was quiet, looking away for a moment to bite her lip. There was so much she wanted to say, so much she had thought about… But she needed to get that one thing out of the way first. Just the one. Maybe then she would know what she wanted. Maybe then she could change her feelings… or continue on as if everything were the same.

Taking a deep breath, she turned back to Strika. “Strika.”

“Y-Yes?”

“… Close your eyes. Please.”

Strika hesitated for a moment, but did as asked. Whatever. If she was going to stab her, then so be it. If that would make her feel better, Strika would live with the pain for a bit. She had probably hurt Red Alert enough as it was…

She wasn’t expecting to feel gentle hands cup her face. Nor was she expecting to feel a warm body press up against hers. And she definitely wasn’t expecting sweet soft lips to kiss her.

Her eyes shot wide open, but she couldn’t move. Completely frozen as she realized Red Alert was kissing her. Nothing hard or aggressive like the night at her house two weeks ago, but… It was still a kiss. A soft and gentle one, her lips molding against hers and never stopping. And it didn’t make sense. Did Red Alert hate her? And she now knew she wasn’t a man… Why would she be kissing her if she knew she was a woman?!

She nearly jumped when the redhead’s hands dropped from her cheeks to her chest. Right where her breasts were. And since she wasn’t wearing her normal binder to hide them, Red Alert was able to cup them somewhat… Even if she didn’t have a binder, she was still flat.

But that didn’t mean she didn’t have breasts Red Alert wasn’t groping.

It was an instinctual reaction. She grabbed her by the arms and pushed her away from her, still holding onto her arms as she held her away. Red Alert just stared at her, panting softly with her cheeks red. And with tears in her eyes.

“You…”

Strika’s eyes widened as the tears started to fall, even though a sad smile graced her face.

“You really are a woman…” She brought up her hands, holding them to her chest as she shook her head. “I-I wasn’t doubting, but… but I-I just needed to be sure… There was just doubt in the back of my mind and… and… My feelings… I didn’t know how to look at you anymore…”

“Red, I-”

“But it doesn’t matter.”

Strika blinked, her face morphing into one of confusion. Didn’t matter? What didn’t matter? Their feelings? Their friendship? She wanted to ask, but feared the answer. She didn’t want things to be over, she didn’t, but… she would respect her choice. Whatever pain it may cause.

“Strika, I… Even though I was hurt, even though I understand…” Her hands balled into fists as she hung her head. “I… I don’t _care_ that you’re a woman. You’re still you.”

“Wh-What-?”

“Strika, I… I was hurt. B-But you had a good reason to lie to me… And it wasn’t your fault that I started liking you. And even after knowing the truth, I… I…”

“Red, I don’t under-”

“I still like you. Even if you are a woman.”

Strika froze, her mouth falling slightly agape. Did she-? Had she-? Was she hearing things? Did she really just say… that she still like her? That Red Alert, who thought she was a man before, still had feelings for her even after she found out she was a woman? But… But Red Alert didn’t like women. She liked big muscular men who could carry her away, like a princess, she once joked. Yes, she was big and muscular herself, but she was also a woman. 

It just seemed too good to be true. That the woman she had feelings for still liked her, despite knowing the truth. That they could actually be together, that they could have a chance at having a real relationship… All her life, Strika never thought she would be able to be with anyone, let alone the woman who had completely stolen her heart.

It was a dream. It had to be a lie…

“B-But Red, I… I can’t give you what… what a man can-”

“If you’re talking about sex, I don’t care that you don’t have a penis,” she said bluntly, cheeks slightly red but her face firm. “I still like you.”

Strika coughed into her hand. It wasn’t as if she thought Red Alert to be a dainty maiden who couldn’t even say “vagina.” She was training to be a doctor – she knew how to and could be blunt whenever it was necessary. And she supposed now was a necessary time… Still, Strika just couldn’t wrap her head around it. It just couldn’t have been true!

Red Alert suddenly wrapped her arms around her waist, Strika gasping before her hand grabbed her shoulders. But she couldn’t bring herself to push her away, not with her holding her so tightly, so desperately… trying to make her believe she wasn’t lying. That everything she was saying was true. That her dreams, her wants, her desires… She could have them. Because Red Alert wanted them too. 

“Strika… Please… if we both like each other, then-!” She paused to bury her face into her broad chest, only feeling a bit of softness from the other’s small breasts. “Please… Can we try? Just… I like you. I really like you…" 

Strika didn’t know what to do. She wanted to say yes. How could anyone deny the opportunity to be with the one they loved? It was a dream, a wonderful dream she didn’t want to wake up from.

But the fear was still there. That one day, Red Alert would realize that this was all for naught. That she actually couldn’t be with a woman, no matter how masculine she looked. That she preferred the touch and feel of a man, who had parts Strika would never have. It would devastate her if it happened, but… but…

Strika wrapped her arms tightly around the other, holding her close as she kissed the top of Red Alert’s head. The smaller woman’s wrapped tighter around her, pressing her face more into her chest. Damn it all, it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered anymore. She wanted to be with her, despite everything. She wanted to give them a chance. That was more than she could ever ask for.

If her fears did come true, then she would just suffer when that time came. Until then though, she would make the most of their time together. Whether it was a week or a month or a year, Strika would love her until Red Alert couldn’t take it anymore.

For now, she would just relish in the happiness of having her wish come true. 


End file.
